Marriage is one of the oldest institutions in society. It concerns human relationships at every level and has survived all odds since time immemorial. Marriage as an institution has been practiced for centuries, when defined broadly; marriage is considered a cultural universal. However, during the past few decades, major social changes in Western countries have led to changes in the demographics of marriage, with the age of first marriage increasing, less people marrying, and many couples choosing live in relationships rather than marry. More and more young people wish to experiment rather than get married, and as such live in relationships are becoming quite common. Live in relationships in India though not illegal are considered as moral or improper. However, many couple choose to live together in metro cities like Mumbai, Delhi etc. Because of the dramatic increase in the number of these relationships, there are fewer objections to this kind of relationship than there were in the 1960s. Religious reasons are a primary factor that oppose live in relationships. Christianity, Judaism, and Islam all oppose this relationship. These religious groups agree living together before marriage is a violation of their moral beliefs on the sanctity of a sexual relationship between a man and a woman outside of marriage. However Live in relationships are still being preferred by the modern youth. So what is it that makes live in relationships desirable?
1. Compatibility
Live in relationships are perfect for testing your partner’s compatibility. You can get a sneak peek into what your wedded life might be like. You can also know about your partner’s views on religion, sex, money and politics. Many live in couples also come to know about each other’s interest and common views. Many married couples see a different side to their spouses every day and then wonder how did I not notice that before? Live in relationships on the other hand allow the partners to know each other every well, lest after getting married some annoying habit of your partner explodes right in your face. You’ll be able to observe what the other does in the privacy of his/ home, learn about each other’s quirks, practice keeping the romance alive while juggling a busy life, and see how well you’re able to get back to compatibility when there are challenges.
2. No Societal Norms
A live in relationship does not bog down an individual to the norms of the society as a marriage will. Because they currently fall outside the norms of societal structure, the adverse influence of society can be avoided in them. This means that live-in relationships do not follow the otherwise necessary diktats of society. The burdens of social relationship are less in a live-in relationship and it actually helps a relationship blossom further. A person can choose to be away from his partner’s family and friends if he feels he is not welcome or is being shunned by them. Most of the modern youth today have no problems on this account and are a lot more open minded so it doesn’t become necessary for the other partner to attend any familial get-togethers.
3. More Time
Live in couples also enjoy spending more time with each other which might not be possible in a marriage because of time constraints. A partner may not feel alone as the other partner is always with them. Live in couples are also with each other almost every single day. In a marriage, when one spouse leaves or may not be present for some important event, then there are feelings of betrayal, anger and hurt. In a live in relationship, however, a Partner is always there to provide moral and emotional support when you might be thousands of miles away from your family. Live in couples can also live independent lives so that each partner gets to fulfill his own ambitions, dreams and desires.
4. Financial relief
Live-in relationships also guarantee immense financial freedom for both parties involved. In a marriage however, it is generally accepted that the married couple share their earnings and enter into joint financial venture. However, not all married couples follow these rules. In today’s day and age even married couples tend to keep their financial matters separate and many live-in couples decide to share their individual earnings. If a live in couple are on good financial terms with each other they can agree to share their earnings with each other which is beneficial as it ensures that both the couples are on the same page. There are no arguments or conflicts relating money problems and this helps in strengthening the relationship. The couple has faith in each other as they become sure that the money is being spent wisely.
5. Responsibility
There is also very less load of responsibility as compared to marriage. Married people have to manage all the responsibility of family including children, relatives, kith and kin while couples in a live in relationships have only their own responsibility. Live in couples also have more understanding and space so sharing responsibilities is not something difficult. Live in relationships can be happier if the couples learn to live together in understanding and not piling up responsibilities on a single partner. There are no hassles that come with a marriage like looking after the children, providing for them, entertaining relatives. Live in couples can also have their own personal lives and if the couple have a strong bonding together, they will not intrude in each other’s personal space which is often a constraint in marriage when a spouse might feel suffocated or burdened down with responsibilities.
6. Freedom
This is the main benefit of live in relationships over marriage. Couples don’t have to give up any rights nor accept any duties or responsibilities. Couples are free of any obligations and can choose to live their life as they please. There are no commitment issues as in a marriage and a couple can have a long term relationship together if both of them are happy. Live in relationships offer personal freedom to both partners compared to marriage. Couples might be hesitant about taking responsibilities but if both of them are in a loving and understanding relationship then both of them can decide to take and share responsibilities equally. If the couple is independent then they can also choose to spend their expenses as they please. Live in relationships are more suited to today’s fast paced life.
7. No Divorce
This is quite possibly the biggest advantage of a live in relationship over marriage. Marriages have lost their appeal to the younger generation because it means commitment and not many people can handle that along with faithfulness and fidelity. Marriages involve more legal problems and are sometimes considered an unnecessary and expensive ritual. The biggest advantage of a live in relationship is that it can be brought to an abrupt end. In order to dissolve a marriage, on the other hand, one has to go through lengthy, cumbersome and expensive divorce procedures. A divorce can be a traumatic and hurtful experience with false allegations and counter allegations making it a cruel battle of wits where no one wins except may be the lawyers. Many people are scared to enter into a new relationship after a troubled or abusive marriage.
8. Test For Marriage
In today’s world where divorce lawyers are growing wealthy due to abundance of cases, it might not be a bad idea to test-run a relationship to see if it would work out or not. A live-in relationship helps you to assess your partner more accurately and honestly. A person can pretend to be something that they are not when they meet you occasionally (during your courtship period), but no one can pretend or hide their true personality 24x7. Arunima Singh Jhhad, who got married to her boyfriend after being in a two year long live-in relationship with him says, "You get to know each other a lot better and also develop instincts which will be a big advantage if you two ever get married."
Article By :- Shruti Rai
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